Feeling Overwhelmed? How Creativity Can Help You Slow Down and Reconnect

[Discover how hands-on creativity can create space to slow down, ease overwhelm, practice self-compassion, and reconnect with yourself in motherhood.]

Years ago, I bought knitting needles and yarn.

I wanted to learn to knit. I had friends who knitted, and there was something about watching their hands move, the yarn looping around the needles, slowly becoming something, that always drew me in.

But when I actually tried it?

It felt complicated.

Eventually, I learned to use one of those little round knitting looms instead. I taught my girls, too, and they took off with it, making stuffed animals, pillows, and all sorts of creations over the years.

The actual knitting needles stayed mostly untouched.

Until an email from Alice O’Connell landed in my inbox.

Alice is a former TV and theatre actress and the founder of Learn to Knit. She first picked up knitting while working on television sets like Doctor Who and Silent Witness, and she has now been teaching people around the world to knit for more than 20 years.

But it wasn’t really the knitting that made me want to invite Alice onto the Soul Care Mom Podcast.

It was what she said knitting had given her.

A place to slow down.

Something tangible to return to when she felt overwhelmed.

A way to practice patience with herself.

A small space that belonged to her through motherhood, enormous changes in identity, and some of the hardest seasons of her life.

And somewhere between Alice’s first email and the day we sat down to record our conversation, I went looking for those old knitting needles.

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[Disclaimer: The information shared is from personal experiences and/or research. We’re not medical professionals. We share in hopes that it will help you tap into new insights and inspire you. Everything shared is for informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for medical advice. Always seek the guidance of a trusted health professional for your unique journey.]

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Giving Yourself Permission to Be a Beginner

I found some yarn. I figured out how to cast on.

That alone felt like an accomplishment.

Then I knitted one row.

And another.

My stitches weren’t particularly even. My hands felt awkward trying to hold the needles and yarn at the same time. I had to keep stopping to figure out what I was supposed to do next.

Originally, I planned to make a tiny square.

Nothing useful. Nothing impressive. Just enough that when Alice and I met, I could hold it up and say, Look! You inspired me to finally try.

Except when I got to the point where I could have stopped, I didn’t want to take it off the needles.

Maybe, I thought, I’ll keep going.

Maybe this will become a scarf.

A slightly wonky, lumpy, bumpy scarf.

When I told Alice about it during our conversation, she said something that shifted the way I thought about those uneven little rows.

Mistakes, she explained, aren’t signs of failure. They’re indications that we’re learning. She has spent decades watching beginners move from those first uncertain stitches into greater ease and confidence, and she believes there is something important about allowing ourselves to experience that messy beginner stage.

I started thinking about how rarely we give ourselves permission to do that as adults.

And perhaps especially as mothers.

So much of our day asks us to be capable.

We remember appointments and meals and shoes and water bottles. We answer questions. We solve problems. We make decisions, often while someone is calling our name from another room.

Then we sit down with two sticks and a piece of yarn and suddenly…

we don’t know what we’re doing.

There’s something strangely freeing about that.

Creativity Doesn’t Have to Be Productive

We hear a lot about finding time for self care.

Sometimes that means resting.

Sometimes it means moving our bodies, sitting quietly, going outside, or finally having a few minutes when no one needs anything from us.

But there’s another kind of nourishment I think we sometimes overlook:

making something simply because we want to make it.

Just because our hands want to touch something soft and our minds want somewhere gentle to land.

Alice described knitting as something that can slip into an ordinary, busy life. It doesn’t require the perfect cozy chair beside the fire or hours of uninterrupted time. It might happen while you’re waiting at your child’s activity or in a few quiet minutes at home. For her, it offers something tactile and creative without the overstimulation that can come from automatically reaching for a phone.

I love that.

Because sometimes we finally get a break and discover that we don’t actually feel rested.

The house may be quiet, but our minds are still going.

Our bodies haven’t quite gotten the message that we can soften yet.

Sometimes having one small thing to do with our hands gives all that restless energy somewhere to go.

One Stitch at a Time

Alice calls her approach “One Stitch at a Time.”

When you look at an entire piece of knitting, especially as a beginner, all those loops can feel confusing. But you don’t actually have to understand the whole thing at once.

You only have to work the stitch in front of you.

Then the next.

Then the next.

Alice sees life much the same way.

There are seasons when looking at the whole month feels overwhelming. Sometimes even looking at the whole day is too much. So perhaps we come back to the next five minutes instead.

The next thing.

The next breath.

The next stitch.

There’s something deeply comforting about that to me.

We don’t always need to know how everything is going to turn out before we begin.

“What Colors Do I Like?”

One part of my conversation with Alice has stayed especially close to me.

Alice is British but lives in Amsterdam, where she had her daughter. Without extended family nearby, early motherhood could feel incredibly isolating.

She described a time when she felt as though she were standing outside the world with her face pressed against the glass.

She was exhausted. Her daughter slept little. She had lost so much autonomy and was carrying all the tiny decisions that come with caring for a baby.

She didn’t quite know who she was anymore.

And she picked up her knitting.

Sometimes her daughter would nap for only ten or fifteen minutes, so that was all the time Alice had.

She would simply pick up something that felt soft and cozy and begin.

And one of the questions knitting allowed her to ask was almost startlingly simple:

What colors do I like?

What color do I want to put here?

I love the tenderness of that.

Motherhood asks us to become fluent in someone else’s preferences.

Which snack will they eat?

Which cup do they want?

Is that cry tired or hungry?

We become experts at considering everyone else.

And somewhere inside a ten-minute nap, Alice was holding yarn and considering herself.

What do I like?

She described knitting during that season as almost a physical pause button—a small space where she could nurture herself and begin finding her way back to who she was.

Maybe reconnecting with ourselves doesn’t always require some enormous act of reinvention.

Sometimes it begins with choosing a color.

What If You’re “Not Creative”?

Toward the end of our conversation, I asked Alice what she would say to the woman listening who thinks:

But I’m not crafty.

I’m not creative.

Her answer was beautiful.

Alice doesn’t believe creativity is simply something we either have or don’t have. She thinks of it more like a muscle—something we exercise and expose to inspiration.

And if you want to try knitting, her advice is wonderfully simple.

Find some needles. Find yarn that feels good in your hands. Find someone who makes learning feel safe and encouraging.

Then give yourself permission to learn.

Not to be good.

To learn.

In Alice’s classes, she reminds students that learning something new with their hands takes courage and self-compassion.

I think that applies to so much more than knitting.

Painting.

Gardening.

Pottery.

Sewing.

Playing an instrument.

Writing something no one else will ever read.

Making bread.

Picking up the thing you bought three years ago and quietly tucked into a closet because you couldn’t figure it out immediately.

Maybe there is something you’ve wanted to try.

And maybe it doesn’t have to become anything.

Maybe you’re allowed to be terrible at it for a while.

Maybe you’re allowed to make the lumpy, bumpy scarf.

Mine is still sitting on my knitting needles as I write this.

A little uneven, but I think I’m going to keep going.

One stitch at a time.

Listen to the Conversation

Listen to my full conversation with Alice O’Connell on the Soul Care Mom Podcast: One Stitch at a Time: A Gentle Way Through Overwhelm.

We talk about creativity, perfectionism, motherhood, identity, learning to be a beginner, and the ways Alice has returned to knitting through some of the biggest seasons of her life.

You can learn more about Alice and her knitting classes and tutorials at learntoknitonline.com or find her on Instagram at @learntoknitonline.

And I’d love to hear from you:

Is there something you’ve always wanted to learn—not because you need to be good at it, but simply because some little part of you wants to try?

Thank you for joining me for this heart-centered conversation.

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If you’re ready to start your own journey to more peaceful, present parenting, I invite you to download my free gift: Kickstart Your Calm Morning – a simple but powerful 5-minute morning ritual to help you start every day feeling calm and energized.

Sending You So Much Love!

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